The Rundown

When I was a kid, I thought police officers were really scary people.

The intimidating all blue uniform with those guns, handcuffs, T-baton, to a kid, I didn't know they were the good people. I always thought that these police officers would arrest me if I did something naughty. So that's why I was scared of them. And that's why I wanted to become a the bad guy with the gun who shoots innocent people because I thought they were the good cool people.

But now, after becoming a police officer myself, I know that all that is a load of ... ... rubbish.

Police officers are cool man! In fact, we rock!

We've got the best uniform there is. And the best thing is, is that kids are scared of us! whooO!

Ok, fine. That was unnecessary. But really though. In our police uniform, there's a great sense of dominance and superiority when it comes to dealing with civilians.

In the charge office (where they process all the people arrested under our custody), there would be a good handful of people who come through there everyday. And when we escort accused anywhere, there'd always be a clear indication that we as policeman are a lot more cool than the accused in them civilian clothing because the uniform tells them who's boss. Sure, there are cases where the accused would retaliate and completely humiliate the police officer in a fist fight, but we won't go into that.

The point is, I love how I am the police officer in uniform and how the accused is the, so called 'bad guy'. hehe

And what makes it all so much more cool is when we holster all the equipments onto our belts. It makes us look even more intimidating with all these wonderful contraptions which people don't know how to use.

Fine, I also don't know how to use some of them, but that's beside the point.

When I went in for my 3rd shift yesterday, I have to admit that I really wasn't all that 'excited' about going in. I couldn't sleep properly because I knew that the hour was coming for me to get up from bed and prepare myself for a tiresome 12 hours in the Police HQ. It was really hard trying to be positive about where I had to do my shifts because it isn't really pleasant to do what I have to do in there. I tried to look at all the 'possible' things that could be great about this job but really, there wasn't.

It's even worse than a normal person's working life. At least in the office you'd stay in there for like what? 9 hours? Give or take. And of course during that time, you can do whatever you want, as long as you complete your work.

Like for example, one could take multiple toilet breaks by drinking heaps of water. And even if you had to drink water, you'd have to walk somewhere to get it so you could kill even more time by walking from the computer to the water tap. Of course, this is just a suggestion. Not that ... I've done any of that ...

Anyway, with this 12 hr shift, there isn't really a time where you can 'relax'. Everyone has gotta be on their toes. If something goes wrong with the accused, we could all pay the price. That's why this is such a dangerous posting. And to make up for all the dangerous possibilities that could take place in there, they're giving us another $100 for 'risk allowances'. Just so that if anyone asks, the government could always say that they paid us extra money for whatever danger we were put through. Quite convenient I'd say.

I realised how dangerous this job really is when I had to do the night shift last Thursday night. I was the only officer in charge of the lock up and there were 3 guys in the cell. Having that in mind, how does this picture sound?

A 17 year old NSmen looking after 5 accused who were going to be charged in court, alone in a police division lock up with no one around. The closest officers who could reach me to save me if my life was at stake would be some 20 metres away behind 2 metal security doors that would take approximately 30-40 seconds to pass through, provided you were really quick enough to make your way through. I'd say that in 30-40 seconds, I could take down 10 wrestlers with a revolver and possibly a drunken diva ....

..... with my T-baton.

I mean, seriously. Don't you think that this situation could turn nasty? This is only 5 accused. Imagine a whole lock-up filled with people and there's only one or even two police officers in there. And now, imagine if those one police officer was an NSmen. And now, imagine if that NSmen was me. Don't you think it's just a little bit dangerous?

But what's the most we can do? Nothing really. All I'm doing about it is complaining about it on my blog and whoever else comes into my path, but that's about it. Being NSmen, there really isn't much point complaining because whatever you get, you just do. Whether you do a good job of it or not, that's a different story.

The NS guys in there told me, "Whenever someone gives you a job, just say yes. End of story."

One time, my friend said yes and never actually did anything about it. As a result, he got canned big time. Not too sure if I want that happening to me any time soon. Especially when I want to get out of there without much of a record. Notice that I said 'without much' ;P

Anyway, there's a time to complain, and there's a time to do work. I really wasn't all too happy about the whole situation but what could I do? I really didn't know.

That was until some people came to me and gave me some advice I was deprived of hearing - 'Do it for God'. I had completely forgotten that. Really, I had.

I had taken the entire situation into my hands and wondered, 'What can I do?', 'How can I do this?', 'What's the point of me doing this?' Until I heard those few words, I was completely caught in my own self centred world where everything was about me and not about God.

You'd be amazed by how quickly everything becomes so much brighter when God becomes the centre focus. Do it all for God and amazing things will come forth.

But of course I'm not here to be some lecturer about the greatness of God. I'm just trying to say that God was really the turning point in all this. He always has and always will be.

And with this, I went in with a more excited heart to work for God and it was so much better. Yesterday, I was put into the Filer section where I do most of the paperwork filing, and as long as I did it for God, it was all ok. I worked hard, and played hard. Most of the time, I'd end up with nothing else to do because I had finished all the filing work and no one was out in our area causing too much trouble to file any police reports. But then of course, it was a Sunday morning/arvo. People were still in their beds creating who knows how many 'la-la' lands.

So tonight, I must try. Tonight, I'm back in the lock up section where I have to stay awake for the entire night. Let's see how things turn out this time as I venture in a lot more prepared; unlike last time when I went in with nothing but my iPod and a mini What On Earth Am I Here For? book by Rick Warren. That night went by like a snail on a treadmill.

Anyway, if you see me blogging in the next few days, it means I am in the mood to blog and not too tired by the fact that the Singapore National Day is coming up and we as policeman are activated. I really don't hope I have to go but I believe the odds are against me.

Rush Hour 2

The sad part is that I have to work 12 hour shifts.

The great part is that I get 2 days off.

The sad part is that I have to work at night.

The great part is that this is a different sort of exposure.

The sad part is that I have to work there till the 22nd of Oct.

The great part is that I'm not being confined, kinda.

The sad part is that a lot of people who can make your life a living torture roam the place like sharks.

The great part is that everyday is another day to completing NS.

The sad part is that I will have no luxury items with me during my shift.

The great part is that this is not permanent. Phew.

This is my life for the next 3 months. Fortunately, when I did some simple calculations, I'll actually only be serving 1.5 months because half the time, I'll be 'off' but it'll still be considered '3 months of National Service" =D. Iif it wasn't for these offs, I believe I would be on the verge of commanding myself to 'langkah merusuk, ke hadapan, gerak' off the roof of a 20 storey building.

I mean, really! 12 hours!? I've never even slept that long before! How am I to survive!?

My other friend who took the night shift yesterday started at 8pm. I had a moment of remembrance for him before I continued with whatever I did at 8pm. When I woke up this morning at 7:30am, I was still thinking about him and how long it has been; even with me sleeping at night, I still felt for him because he wouldn't be done for another 30 minutes.

I dunno if I should be more scared of the day shifts or the night shifts.

At first, I thought it would be better to have the night shift because there wouldn't be any big ranks walking around. But then again, I realised that I make a very bad friend to the insomniacs.

But then again, having the day shifts can be just as bad. In fact, having any 12 hour shift can be bad. It's bad enough I complained about my nine and a half hour work back in Feb when I was working as the admin. Now, I have to add another two and half hours of work? Oh no.

Anyway, there are only a few things that really comfort me in knowing that things aren't as bad as they could be.

For one, God is always with me and I'm really appreciative of that.

The other thing is that this is only temporary and I get 2 days off from work after the 2 days of day followed by night shifts. Having two days off is just awesome because it gives me time to just get away from the Police HQ and away from everything NS related. Thank God for this luxury =P

And something new that someone told me is that people 'get used to' this kinda shifts. I didn't know this and to at least know that I could get accustomed with this kinda odd timing shifts are somewhat comforting to know, because obviously having to go somewhere with total reluctance can be quite horrible to live through. So at least to know that this is something that one could get used to is great.

Anyway, with all this, my first day shift starts tomorrow at 8am. I have to report at 7am at the station all dressed and ready for the morning briefing. In Singapore, the sun doesn't rise till 7am, so I'll be, once again, watching the sun rise.

I do realise that I have been looking at this in a negative way and sure, there are a lot of things that I could look at positively .. but it's hard and I don't wanna. The thought of a 12 hour work shift scares me. I really don't know how I would survive something like that. I haven't even stayed online on MSN for that long before. And boy is that long.

On the whole, my schedule for everything will be messed up. This is because for this posting, everything is a 4 day week; two days work, two days off. This means I will miss out a lot on church for the next 3 months =( I thought it would be a lovely 5 day week, but I guess I was wrong.

Anyway, this post has been depressing enough. It'll be kinda funny if I rock up tomorrow night saying that everything was great and fun and I can't wait for the next shift! If that happens, you'll be sure to see me blogging about it!

In the mean time, I'm not happy at all. lol

Just Follow Law

This week, I was on course for my new temporary posting as a PIC officer.

PIC stands for Person-In-Custody which basically translates into police officers taking care of people in police custody, may they be accused persons or people seeking police protection. So this is where we come in. We take care of people in our lock-up.

But of course, this means there is the possibility of unpredictable 'human danger'. The accused can at any time attack the police officer on duty with whatever they could get their hands on. This just means we have to be more careful with what we do and stuff. But then again, I will not be doing this for long.

As I said above, this is only temporary. This will only go until September because ...

... I got into the OCT course. =D

The OCT course doesn't start till September so they had to give us something to do and this just happened to be it.

Nevertheless, before the POP, my OC informed me during our graduation dinner that I had passed the final interview and am in for the OCT course. The final hurdle will be a final of the final interview at the Central Manpower Base (CMPB) sometime later. Not too sure what we have to do there but he told me that if you manage to get to the CMPB stage, it means you're pretty much through. So praise God. All obstacles were cleared!

By right, a lot of things should not have happened.

Because I volunteered for NS (before turning 18), I was 'not suppose' to have done many things. Mainly these:-

• Wear the ever respected dark blue uniform for the Singapore's Special Constable (SC) as I was supposed to be a Vigilante Corps (VC).




• Hold a gun




• Shoot a gun




• Be with the ITE squad (by right, I was suppose to be in the VC squad but in actual fact, I was suppose to be in the A-Level squad)




• Wear the Corporal rank




• Receive the PNS award




• Get into OCT

And so who do we blame for all this? I believe we referred to this phenomenal as an 'Admin Muck-Up'. Don't ask me how all this happened. All I know is that there was an admin muck-up (or at least I'd like to think so XD) and when they discovered that I had made it to the final 4 OCT selection and the top-5 for the PNS award, they realised that I was not even 18 yet. Unfortunately for them, it was too late and now I realise that big organisations can make major mistakes as to see me defy all policies that states people like me aren't allowed to do such things.

In any case, it was a wonderful muck-up and I loved how it all happened. Looking back, it's all so funny.

I even remembered the day I went for the NS registration. It stated on the sheet that I should be a 'VC' and not 'SC'. Yet on the enlistment day, I was automatically placed into a ITE group with me being the only 'A-Level' in the squad. They only recognized that I had an A-Level qualification weeks before I passed out, so that couldn't explain why I was upgraded from VC to SC on the first day.

Nevertheless, what was even more amazing was how I managed to pull through all the way into the OCT course. Actually, I am not allowed to even get nominated because by right, I am 'under aged', yet there was no ruling that said specifically that I was not allowed for this course. So to look at all this now, we really have to thank and praise God for all that has happened thus far.

I say that because I believe that the amazing stuff has not yet been completed. I got this far and I believe that there are much more to come! If God could get me into this very exciting course, surely the course itself will be even more crazy! I will be stressed out to the bone with all my work but I'm sure great results will come of it! Be it something that might praise God or not. Either way, how fun! Can't wait for the real fun to begin!

So I will return back to the Police Academy in September for the officer training. In the mean time, I will be posted to the PIC course. This whole week has been course training for this posting and I have to say, it has been great!

Not the course itself but rather the way the course has been conducted.

The course was suppose to start at 8:30am and finish at 6pm.

But our very cool OC goes, "Ok boys, we'll start at 9am and finish around ... oh, I dunno ... 4:30pm? Sound good?" The first time he said that, we were ecstatic! We were expecting something like 9am to 5pm but to cut an extra 30mins of the lesson, that's even better! But that's the least of it.

Like how he said the lesson would start at 9am sharp; our very cool OC actually rocks up between 9:25am to 9:55am for class. So what do we do before that?

Sleep!

As soon as class began, which usually started moving at 10am, he'd comment that we'll be soon be going on a short break. By 10:30am, he would finally decide that it was appropriate for a class break which will go till 10:50am. At first, we were not aware of what we were getting into. We simply agreed that a 20min break would be great but that wasn't it! We were allowed to relax even more because he would rock up at the classroom (because he would go off to his office to eat something) between 11:00am to 11:15am. What do we do during that time? We would either ..

Sleep!

Or stand outside in the corridor terrorising trainees with our Corporal rank and boy is it fun!

Resuming part two of our morning class, our OC then states that we shall leave for lunch at 12pm, no later. Obviously, this kinda motivation keeps us going and we listen. After all, we have been sleeping many times during the day already. Keeping awake in that mightily cold air-con room was not too awfully difficult at this stage.

By 12pm, we would be walking out for our 2 hour lunch break.

But how long can lunch go for? Taking my own sweet time walking, ordering, eating, clearing, walking, all that can take roughly 40mins. So what do I, and the rest of the gang, do for the rest of the time?

Sleep!

I'd usually sleep for an hour or so. Amazed? Yeah! I am too! Especially even after getting 9 hours of sleep every night! But there is something about that room that makes me so sleepy! I think it's the fridge-like air-con.

Would you be shocked if our OC came back at 2pm?

I would be if he did. That's what so great about this guy! He rocks up late all the time so we would usually begin our afternoon session between 2:30pm to 3:00pm. And yes, at 3:30pm, we would usually take a break which would go till 4pm.

But does it start at 4pm sharp? Hardly! As much as we hate him coming back late this time round (cause we wanna go home), he'd usually enter into the classroom around 4:05pm to 4:15pm. So what do we do for the last 15mins of class?

No no, we don't sleep. Not this time. Just endure the final few minutes as he talks about his experiences in the police force. Not too bad I guess. We just have to sit impatiently as we dwell on the thought of running free in the next few minutes. It can get pretty clear that we would be thinking about that because whenever he would pose the question, "Any question?" Everyone would answer, "Nooo."

And that's what I've been doing for this whole week and I'm sad to say that tomorrow is our last day. It's been so much fun, I'm gonna miss it. What's even more cool is that we don't have to march as we walk around the PA. That's so cool! And what's even more cool than that is that we are allowed to eat at the cafe during office hours. So we'd just go downstairs and grab some food during any one of our breaks. Why? Just because we can. Some of them would order Wanton Mee, Chicken Cutlet, Fried Rice, whatever is available. I'd go down for the hot paus (buns) and a cup of ice milo or horlicks.

Oh yes, life as a Singaporean Policeman. The Americans got their donuts. We have our sweet sweet cafe XD

Eddie's Million Dollar Cook Off (Part 4)

"Boaz, please report to syndicate room 37 at 9:15am. I think it's the same room that you went to when you did the OCT interview."

"Yeah, it's the same room. What's this for?"

"It's an interview for the PNS (Police National Service) award."

"The PNS award!? Whoa, really!?"

"Yeah, it's for the best in the whole intake award."

"Wow! Haha, that's really good news! Thank you sir!"

When I received that phone call, I was so much more happy - even after hearing that the reason that I was dropped from the OCT selection was something out of my control. After that, I was even more cheerful. Now there was something else to be happy about. That interview for the best in the intake took over my desire for OCT. I basically converted all excited of getting into the OCT selection to the PNS award. And just to think that I could get that award was enough to keep me going but this time, I was careful not to get too excited because I don't want the same kinda disappointment I experienced when I discovered I was dropped from the OCT selection.

After returning back to the bunk, it was really funny how people still came to offer me their sympathies to me for not getting into OCT. Ok ok, I guess it's not 'funny'. But it was nice to see all these random people coming up to me and asking if I was ok or not. Unaware of the fact that I had already moved on with the thought of the PNS award in my mind. =P

6th July, 2007 (Friday)

We had POP rehearsal that morning at 9am. With the interview at 9:15am, I informed the FI conducting the rehearsal and having no other choice, he allowed me to go off in the midst of the rehearsal.

I marched back to the barrack to get changed and off I went to the Syndicate room.

The last few times I had to go to the room, no one was inside, so I assume there wouldn't be anyone in it this time. But I played it safe and knocked first before opening the door.

*Knock knock* After knocking, I slid the door open and there in that puny room were 6 officers, all of which were high ranking officers; including the OCs of all OCs - let's call him OC K

They all turned to look at me and they were all stunned as was I. I didn't know what to say, and I'm guessing they didn't either. But being the 'intruder', I had better say something, especially when I'm the trainee and they're the police officers.

"Errr ... I think I'm a bit early ... so err... I'll wait outside."

Shocked and not sure of what to say, OC K responded with half broken sentences which clearly indicated that he had no clue what to say either.

In total embarrassment, I quickly made my exit, apologising in the process.

'What a way to start my run for the PNS award huh? ' I thought to myself, 'Won't it be hilarious if I won the award now? The guy who walks into a 'probably top secret meeting' ironically wins the best trainee in the intake award. Oh yes, I've got a good chance now.'

I stood in the end of the corridor, totally embarrassed by what had happened. When OC K came out, I immediately stood in attention and saluted him, apologising again for what had happened. He assured me that it was ok and asked me to walk with him as he wanted to speak to me about what had happened with the OCT selection.

From memory, I think he said, "Has OC 'H' spoken to you yet?"

"No, but my OC talked to me about it. It's ok."

"Well, we didn't know about the situation and should have let you know earlier. But now, it's ok. Everything is ok."

"Yeah, it's ok." And he walked off into the Co-ordination office.

After waiting outside for a few seconds, the door opened again and he saw me. He turned around once more and asked the guys inside, "What do you want to do with the PNS candidates?"

"You can just ask them to come in." With that, he directed me to go on in to the air-conditioned office and it was good. =D

I waited in there, and in time, the other 4 candidates for the PNS award came in.

In time, as we got ready for the interview, we lined up outside the room and as we waited, my OC who was gonna be seated in the interview came up to me and said, "Boaz, I have another piece of good news for you. Can you take a guess?" I couldn't really muster any 'good news' that I could think of at that time because my mind was pretty much beat.

"Nope."

"You have been retained for the OCT selection. So welcome back." As he said this, one of the guys who was one of the original six in the run for OCT shook my hand, congratulating me. In complete shock, I instinctively shook his hand with this blur look on my face. I mean, I had moved on from OCT. When I woke up that morning, I had moved on. I was living life post-OCT and now that I was back in, I had no clue as to what to think. My focus was on OCT the day before, but when I lost it, everything I had hoped as an OCT dropped into a deep dark pit. And so after hearing that I was back in, I didn't exactly know how to react.

"Sir, what happened?"

"Well, they searched the black and white (law books) and found no regulation that stated people like you couldn't be in the run for the OCT selection."

"Wow, that's great..."

At that point in time, I really didn't know what to believe anymore. Was I in? Was I out? Was I supposed to be there at all or not? What was going on!?!?

This completely threw me out for the interview. I didn't really worry too much as to whether or not I got this award or not. Sure, I wanted it. But after hearing something like this, I had to think about OCT life all over again. My focus was like a crappy cheap torchlight - there was no defined beam. I wanted to cry.

The interview went on as usual. I was the last one to go in out of the 5. This was of great benefit to me because as the 4th person went in, I was able to just calm myself down in the presence of God. So quite basically, I had an upper hand against the other 4 candidates. =D

I went in there, and was myself. They asked me to talk, and I talked. It was like a routine really. Just answered everything without offending too many people and I thought it should be ok. Well, that's what I thought.

When I came out of that room, I was quite pleased with my interview and merrily hopped off to my barrack.

We had another POP drill rehearsal that afternoon which ended up finishing around 1735hrs. After that, we quickly went off to our barracks to get packed. The same old same old boring routine of waiting for the Coy Commander to release us happened. When we finally reached the front gate, we passed through it and went our separate ways.

As we parted, I gave my OC a call because I needed to inform him something about the OCT interview that Monday. I spoke to him about it and said it was ok. Also in that conversation, he told me about the results for the interview I had that morning.

"Have you heard about the interview this morning?"

"Nope. I haven't heard anything yet."

"Oh, well basically you got the award." At this point, I was laughing in my heart because I didn't know what I did to actually get that award. Plus, I did walk into that highly top secret meeting room that morning too. Yet, they still gave me the award. hehehe

"Wow! Really? That's good news then."

"Yeah, there were only two really close candidates but you got it."

"Hehe"

I couldn't believe it. I got the award. All for God's glory!

Being the youngest, I didn't think I would be the one sweeping the best trainee in the intake award. Also, on top of that, I obviously had to be the best trainee in my squad, so I got that award too. And to God's glory, I also got the best in professional studies and best in operational fitness.

So in all, I managed to sweep all the awards I could get. XD

And I definitely couldn't have done it without my Lord and Saviour. Without Him, I wouldn't have this body to do all the stuff I did in there so it's all thanks to Him. For those wondering, here are the awards I got.

(Apologies for the crappy pic quality. Had to use the webcam to take the pics because there were 'technical difficulties' with my digital cam which I will not disclose over the world wide web because it is simply embarrassing - not that we need another embarrassing comment.)

In clockwise direction starting with the statue -

PNS Statue Award, Best in Ops Fitness, Best Trainee and Best in Professional Studies.

ANG KHENG HUI BOAZ

SQD NS 15/07

STATUETTE AWARD

BEST PNS TRAINEE

Eddie's Million Dollar Cook Off (Part 3)

What happened later that afternoon was what had me in a bundle of nerves for the next two days.

We had to go to the Police Head Quarters to do a psychological test for the OCT posting and I thought it would be something like the first psychological test we all had to take a few months back. This time however, I felt as though I wanted to cry during the test because I had no clue whether what I was putting down was acceptable or not. In other words, I had no idea whether what I was answering was any where near right.

Basically, this was the section I was struggling with.

They issued us several paragraphs with heaps of statements and facts - each of which were different. However, as we read it, we had to suggest the validness of the 4 responses given relating to a statement in regard to the paragraph given. We did that by answering whether they were 'True', 'False' or 'Can't Tell'.

Sounds easy enough. But combine the elements of being timed in a completely silent tiny room with 9 people crowded around one puny circular table and the most confusing paragraphs of facts and you got Boaz crying out "My God! My God! Why have you forsaken me!?"

Besides that section, the other 3 sections were personality tests, so I doubt I could get any of those ones wrong - unless I was lying all the way through which wouldn't be true because I have never lied once in my entire life ... not even when I blog.

After that test, which was around 4:40pm, the OC who drove us there and picked us up was innocently persuaded to allow us to stop by KFC to grab something to eat. He had to contemplate his decision to abide because by right, he wasn't allowed to do such a thing. But being angels as we always are, he said to us, "I'll safely assume you guys finished at 5:30pm. Be at the place I drop you guys off by 5:30pm. If you're not there on time, I will no wait!"

So with a big grin on our faces, we went to eat ... and it was good.

5th June, 2007 (Thursday)

My OC told me to report to the Co-ordination office at 9:15am for an OCT interview training.

Just to be brief, what happened in there was that we were briefed on how we were to conduct ourselves if we made it to the final OCT interview that following Monday (9th June). That interview, we would have to go to the Old PA to be interviewed by a bunch of other high ranking officers as well as a psychologist. I guess the psychologist was there to determine how 'true' we were in what we were saying. They told us that she would be looking out for our little body gestures to see if we were confident in whatever we were saying.

Anyway, in that morning interview at 9:15am, only four of us made it. The other two were eliminated because they didn't project themselves well in the first interview. So we were the final 4 left in the run for OCT.

Also during this interview training, we were told that by the end of the day, at 5pm, we would know the results for the psychological test. So that was it, the moment of truth was gonna come. I just had to wait. If I passed the psychological test, I would be in for the final interview on Monday. All I needed to see to was that I had to pass the psychological test.

That evening, around 5pm, we were at the parade square practicing for the POP. I knew that it was somewhere around 5pm because the sun had dropped to a certain angle and it was clear that dusk was coming soon.

Knowing that one of the guys in the OCT selection would get the SMS for the results, I went to him to ask if he had gotten the message.

As I approached, I heard him say to his squad mate, "The three of us got in." And they were giving each other this really shocked and happy look at the same time.

When I came up to ask them what the results were, they glanced at each other before inexpressibly telling me that I didn't make it.

In a state of utter shock, I backed away saying, "Oh ok." Flashing a thumbs up at them.

I went back with my group to form up for our POP rehearsal but there was no doubt that my mind was somewhere else. My mind had dropped into a state of free fall because I had so much faith that I would get through. My trust was in God and when I discovered I was out, I felt terrible!

So many people helped me go through, and so many people had belief that I was gonna go through. Everyone was 101% sure I was gonna surpass all obstacles to go through. Everyone had faith in me.

But! I stuffed up. I stuffed it up bad. People carried me so highly all the way only to allow myself to stuff up the only opportunity I had. And it was because of the psychological test that I did that I mucked it all up. It was awful. Those few minutes after receiving news, I blamed myself completely.

As soon as the rehearsal was over, I needed a few moments by myself. I really had to reflect on what had happened. Why God allowed me to get so caught up in something only to let me be disappointed. I pondered on whether there was a lesson to learn from all this. The only thing that could get me 'active' was to try to look on the positive side of things. So I thought about how everything had been an adventure and how I can benefit from this experience.

And so later that night, I promised the others I would go to the cafe for dinner because they had all been told that everyone who failed the first exam passed the re-test. So trying to hide the disappointment within, I agreed to celebrate with them.

On the way to the cafe, one of the officers instructed us to report for finger print taking. Not having much of a choice, we went, and we all lined up for our turn. As I was standing in line, I remained considerably silent and conservative. That remained till I realised my OC was calling for me as he wanted to speak to me.

It was clear that my OC wanted to tell me that I didn't get in. So before he had a chance to say anything, I immediately told him that I knew. I knew that I was out and I felt awful. Surprised that I knew, he asked how I found out.

After explaining the whole situation he goes, "Do you know why you were dropped?"

"I'm not sure but I think it is because of the psychological test we did. I think I failed that test"

"No, no. It wasn't. You're volunteering for NS now right?"

"Yeah. I'm still 17 now."

"Well, policy states that people Volunteering for Early Enlistment are not allegeable for the Officer course."

"What!? Really!? That's a relief! Because the whole time I thought I failed the test and it was all my fault. So many of you had so much confidence in me and I had to go and stuff it up. And to hear that, that's a relief!" From then on, I felt so much better. To know that it wasn't my fault that I had lost the position was such a great thing to hear.

"No, it wasn't your fault. It's ok. It's a bit sad that you got this far only to be told that you are not allegeable for the course. In a way it was a bit unfair because when I sent in your application for your nomination, they should have done the research to determine if you were allegeable."

"Yeah, it would have been a lot better if they did that. Cause after getting my hopes up, I was a lot more disappointed after getting this far. I felt really bad that I might have failed it myself."

"No, don't worry, it wasn't your fault. So what do you think about all this?"

"Well, it was nice to have so many people supporting me and I'll never forget it. And I guess it has been an adventure to have gotten this far. Thanks a lot sir."

"Well, you better go and break the news to your fellow squad mates, especially those concerned about you."

"Ok sir. Thank you."

With such a relief in my mind, I was able to enjoy the night in the cafe with my friends. Even though I didn't get in, at least it wasn't my fault that I wasn't able to reach the finals.

The night drove on as people offered their sympathies to me and I am grateful for it. To see that so many people believed in me was good enough for me. Not only did my whole squad support me 100%, but all the other officers involved as well, such as my OC, the OC of all the OCs and other high ranking officers. To learn that many people were also shocked to discover this policy was good in a way that I will never forget.

And what happened later that evening at the cafe would be one phone conversation from my OC I would never forget either.

To Be Continued ...

Eddie's Million Dollar Cook Off (Part 2)

3rd June, 2007 (Tuesday)
For the first time in a long while, I was finally alone in the bunk. I had remained back as the others went for the POP drill at 8:30am, leaving me behind as I prepared myself for the interview set at 9am. Normally in the academy, there would be people everywhere. Hardly am I able to get away from the sight of people, yet alone the constant gibbering. So to finally be alone, for those few minutes, it was nice.

During that time, I was able to soothingly read my Bible without people yelling at each other. And as time approached, I got dressed.

I had absolutely no clue who else was in the run for the officer course. I merely assumed that there wouldn't be many and I was gonna have to compete with the best.

"I'm here to report for the OCT interview, sir."

"Ok, wait there."

Waiting in a little corner next to one of many desks filled with random office items, I hovered around a small area looking like a trainee who has no clue what awaits him.
After hovering for a minute or so, I was told to wait at room 37.

"Do you know where is it?"

"Yeah."

"It's just down the corridor to your left."

"Room 37 right?"

"Yeah."

"Thank you sir"

We had most of our classes at classroom 37, so I knew exactly where it was. But one thing strange was the fact that one classroom fits 40 people. And if I was not mistaken, the OCT selection should be minimal - not more than 10 at least. Nevertheless, I wandered across to the room and took a deep breath before knocking on the door. As I pulled down the handle, I was soon confronted with the assurance that no one was in the room as the door still remained locked.

'I'm early I guess. I'll just go to the toilet first.'

When I came back out, I tried again to see if anyone had entered as I was away, but no one had unlocked the door. So I stood outside the room, waiting.

waiting ..

waiting ...

waiting ....

waiting .....

'He did say room 37 ... right? ... yeah, I even asked him again. There can't be any other room 37s can there? ... nah, somethings not right.'

I was aware that if I left that room, I would be left to answer for my lateness if I were to return again, but it was better than standing there waiting for someone to come. Surely something was wrong.

"Sir, you said room 37 right?"

"Syndicate room 37."

"Syndicate? Where's that?"

"Just outside this door, make a left."

"OhhhHH!!!"

"Don't act so blur now, you're gonna become an OCT" another officer in the room commented. I responded with a somewhat embarrassed laugh as I quickly made my exit.

The room was literally next door down a narrow corridor. I had no idea that these rooms existed despite having some signs up above at the entrance of the corridor saying "Syndicate Rms 34-48".

I knocked on the door and pushed it open. No one was in the tiny interrogation room. The small air-conditioned room would be way better than standing outside in the humid air. So I proceeded on in.

There was a table with 4 chairs, one on each side. I went to sit on one of the chairs and as I did, I suddenly realised that if some officer walked in, I shouldn't be seen sitting down. So I decided that it would be appropriate if I stood up. Bouncing off the seat, I decided that the best position is to stand 'at ease' (senang diri) in front of the wall which faces the door.

So there I stood. Waiting... waiting... Not long after, I heard voices. Voices coming from the corridor.

'They sound like officer voices. Oh crap! Maybe I shouldn't be in the room! Argh! I can't get out! It's too late! The door handle is opening! Don't move! Ahh!!! I'm gonna die!!!' The door handle went down, and the door slid open and there at the other end were 5 other candidates.

"Oh ... phew! Why did you have to stand like that?" they asked me.

"This is how I stand ... naturally." I replied.

There were 6 of us going for the first OCT interview that day. Four from one squad, and another guy along with myself from 2 other squads.

That interview was to determine how well we could project ourselves and to see how much confidence we had in speaking. As Police Inspectors, we had to be able to present our ideas and other things like that; so we had to be able to at least talk to the four officers in that room.

The other five candidates found it a bit 'unnatural' for them but I was quite ok. They told me that I was perfectly fine. My interview with them was like any other conversation for me because of my exposure to other countries of different cultures. So talking in that room to four people about my life was a piece of cake basically.

However, I did stuff up one bit. I knew it was a mistake the moment I said it and I tried to cover up and try not to highlight what I had said.

What happened was, one of the officers asked me 'why do you think so many of your squad mates failed the exam?'

When he asked that, the truth came out which I should not have said and already had the intention before the interview to not say it if they asked me. Yet, it leaked out and I regret saying it cause it got my OC in trouble, so to speak.

"Well, most of them were sleeping in class but our OC tried. He tried to wake them up whenever they fell asleep but eventually, he gave up and said that this is your basic training. If you fail and recourse, it wouldn't be his problem because he's already played his part. It's up to you to play your part. But also, they don't study. If they had put in the effort to try to study in the barrack, I'm sure most of them would pass."

"So wait, your OC allows your friends to sleep in class?"

"Yeah well, he said that you should play your part to pay attention and study, and he will play his part to teach. But OC really did try his best. He tried to keep them awake but they wouldn't listen."

"I see ... mmm"

From that moment on, I knew I did the wrong thing. And that my OC was in trouble.

To Be Continued ...

Eddie's Million Dollar Cook Off (Part 1)

I still can not believe what has happened.

The past two mornings, I have woken up not believing what has happened to me. In fact I still can't believe it has happened, which is why I just had to get off my bed this morning to blog about what has happened while I still can.


For me, everything has seem so unrealistic. For me, this has been my life. For me, this has been real. But for you guys, this is only a mere story about some kid in the Police serving his National Service.


So I ask, that this just this once - empathise with me. Imagine everything as if you were in my shoes as I say what I have to say in the next few paragraphs. And maybe you might realise how everything to me during the past week has just seemed so unreal.

I would like to thank God for taking me out of the officer course for the Police Inspector rank. It has revealed to me what a blind bat I have been during my 'run' for it. I was too caught up in the thinking that I would be the best among them all for all the things I have done in the past and in my basic training. I was so blind to see that there was so much love and support around me, I took it for granted. So when God took me out of the officer course, it was a good smack in the head as I dropped all my eggs in that one basket, leaving just one little egg in the basket whole.

Pride became humility. Arrogance became repentance. And my will became God's will.

It was wonderful that I took that smack in the head because I now realise what a fool I was basking in my own 'greatness' and 'glory' I had forgotten to see what was happening around and in me. So I have to thank God will all my heart because I was getting too carried away. I hope I have changed for the good.

So this is the story. Let truth and humility be told in everything I say from here. I only ask that you empathise with me as I tell the story of my final week in the Police Academy as a trainee. Praise God!


2nd July, 2007 (Monday)
This was the first day of the week. The first day of intensive POP training. Mentally, the realisation that we would be drilled in the grilling sun for hours was there. And true enough, it was bad.
The morning alone started after flag raising which would usually end around 0710hrs but that was bad already. The sun was there and we started to sweat.

Second became minutes, and minutes became hours. Eventually, somewhere in the 9th hour, I got a call from my OC to have me pass my OCT 'resume' for the pen-picture he has to put up. Basically on the form, I typed up a list of significant achievements and contributions, and key and concurrent roles appointed in school.

I separated myself from the squad and informed the officer in charge that I needed to give my OC something. He allowed my departure but requested that I make it fast, so I made a run for it.

Running out of the Parade Square, I ran all the way back to my coy which was some 100m run. When I got there, the room where all the keys were held was locked as the person in charge had left his post. By right, he was not allowed to do this.

So just to make sure that no one was really inside, I knocked on the door and tried to open the door but true enough, it was locked. Having no other choice, I ran back to the parade square, hoping that our bunk IC had the key to our bunk.

Fortunately for me, when I ran back there, they were still having their break so I could casually just run in and run out.

I got to my squad and asked if our bunk IC had the key but he didn't. It was in that room which was locked. My other squad mate immediately suggested that I use the clothes hanger on their window ledge to open the door. Not really having much time to contemplate the situation, I ran back to the coy.

I ran up to the bunk to see if I could retrieve the clothes hanger they asked me to use. To my gladness, I was able to find the hanger but I knew that the chances of me being able to pull down the door handle would be minute and time consuming. Nevertheless, I had to try cause I had no other choice.

As I was attempting to pull the handle down from the outside, I noticed that the room where the keys were kept was open.

Leaping off my thief-like position, I quickly replaced the clothes hanger and made a run for the room.



That night, after returning from a day of intensive POP drilling, I was exhausted to find tucked under my pillow a set of notes. I knew my OC would be giving me some materials to read about the Singapore Police Force Mission, so this was not much of a surprise. And neither was the duplicate copy of the pen-picture he had typed up for me. But after reading the pen-picture, I felt so 'decorated' because to see how my OC had raised me up so highly in that pen-picture was amazing. I have to admit that it felt good. Things that no one other than my close friends and family had said, but for someone who I have only known for only 3 months to say such things, it was great.

Also, on one side of one of the paper, I noticed that he had written,

Co-ordination office
Full-U @ 0900hrs

This was the interview he had told me about last week. The interview that get it all started. The interview where pride began to creep up.



To Be Continued ...